Subterranean Serenade
by Stonecreek
Summary: [Spoilers for Gem Drill] Even Steven's optimism has its limits. Seeing the Cluster and what it almost became strains his normal cheer to the breaking point. Steven, being Steven, employs song therapy to remedy the situation.
**A.N. –** Post-Gem Drill (so spoilers for that), but before any of the other episodes of the In Too Deep sequence. I wanted Steven to have some sort of epiphany of just how close of a brush with mortality he had facing down the Cluster. And, since the show hasn't yet had him brood about that, I will. Song lyrics are mine (and in _italics_ ); SU is Rebecca Sugar's property that I'm just drabbling around in.

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 **Subterranean Serenade**

Emerging above-ground into the daylight, Steven's first feeling was euphoria. He'd saved the day! Relief soon followed. The Cluster was no longer an imminent threat! The fear only crept in later.

What had he done?

Steven had done his mother proud, the Gems assured him. And, as Peridot would say, Steven felt big at the thought of what he'd accomplished in subduing the Cluster and its urge to form. But as night fell and the debriefing of the day's missions faded into the gloaming evening, Steven was left unsettled. He imagined it was much the way the Cluster felt right at that moment.

When he had dream-dived with Laps before, the person he encountered was battered and weary – but a known quantity. And, while Lapis was alien, her thoughts followed discernable trains – thus her mindscape made sense to Steven. The Cluster held no trappings of the familiar in either form or mind. But Steven was nothing if not generous in his loving nature, and everything living thing deserved its chance. So the Cluster would get one as well.

It was beautiful, awe-inspiring on first sight. The gorgeous glow seemed so at odds to the reason it was buried deep beneath the Earth's surface in the first place. It wasn't until the first fragmented whispers echoed inside Steven's head that the danger sunk in for him. The Cluster was an amalgam of beings that rightfully should not have been at all, yet it was here now and terribly uncertain about its state of being. Steven sympathized; as a half-human, half-gem, there was always a subtle battle being waged within the young boy. The Cluster's was far more out in the open, the consequences for failing far more severe.

But he was a Crystal Gem; protecting the planet was goal number one. And, hours later and literal miles away from the resolution of the crisis, Steven still wasn't sure if he'd accomplished what he'd set out to do. The Earth wouldn't explode anytime soon, he was sure. What Steven was less sure of was the cohesiveness of the shards miles beneath him and just how long they'd hold.

So here he was, sat outside the barn with his ukulele next to him, digesting one of the longest days of his life. Songwriting usually helped Steven sort out what was bothering him, but Steven wasn't even sure there was much to be bothered over. He'd done good work today, and possibly made another friend (another million or three?) while seeing another returned to him from the ocean's depths. By all rights, it was a banner occasion, and a song should come to him easily. Yet the strings remained silent, the thoughts in Steven's head too jumbled to put to words.

He truly felt for the millions of broken lives smashed together unwillingly. They'd been left in the dark to ponder their incompleteness with only one purpose – and he'd subverted that purpose. They spoke to him and only him. Steven alone had to bear the weight of responsibility that, after conversing to the best of his ability with the Cluster, the decision he reached would be the best for not only them but the rest of the world, too.

The many disparate parts that made up the forced fusion weren't easily swayed to the same drumbeat, either. The cacophony of disembodied voices was hard to piece together for Steven. And, in the end, he'd only been able to respond the clearest, the loudest of the bunch. The Cluster had no unified voice, so…

He'd give the Cluster a voice through his song.

The idea came to him from the back of his head, a quiet nudge much like the first inkling he'd had of the Cluster's presence. It was so similar that Steven was unsure if it was truly his idea at all. Perhaps the Cluster still clung to some deep recess of his mind. Glancing at the ukulele, Steven decided to let this feeling flow through him, to see what would come. Slowly, softly, he sang out, as if entranced:

 _Come fly with me, come cry with me  
In the depths of history come be with me  
Please help me try to understand  
these feelings I can't comprehend  
Please show me how you are so free  
Help me finds the perks of being me_

As the words poured out, Steven couldn't be sure whether he was tapping subconsciously into the Cluster's thoughts again, or if this was all his emotions spilling forth, but the next verse felt as if it flowed from somewhere beyond himself:

 _I'll fly with you, I'd die for you  
In a bed of what is true, I lay with you.  
Given me the life for which I yen.  
Turned me from a foe into a friend.  
You've shown me who I've wanted to be.  
Thanks for finding the perks of being me._

Steven laid back on the cool grass as the song tapered off, wiping a stray tear from his eye. While not a perfect catharsis, the music did soothe Steven somewhat – and perhaps the Cluster, too, if the low murmur of the soil beneath him was any indication. The slight shifting of the sediment was lulling Steven to a state of slumber. His last conscious thought was of the Cluster serenading him off to sleep.


End file.
